


All Of My Friends Who Think That I’m Blessed, They Don’t Know My Head Is A Mess

by Spout789



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-28
Packaged: 2020-05-28 12:59:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19394647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spout789/pseuds/Spout789
Summary: I received this prompt on my tumblr (1-2-3-4-5-six) For a prompt, could you write something REALLY angsty about Boleyn or Howard with 'I can't do anything right'? Thanks, and have a nice day!





	All Of My Friends Who Think That I’m Blessed, They Don’t Know My Head Is A Mess

If you asked the queens about Anne they’d say things like, she’s confident, she’s loud, she’s energetic, she’s also impulsive, disorganised and distracted.

What they don’t seem to notice is that Anne is also tired, Anne is really tired, tired of making mistakes, tired of feeling like she’s on thin ice, tired of the flashbacks.

All Anne wants is for the day to be over with so she can hideaway in her room away from the others, she just wants to be invisible for a while, unluckily for her that’s pretty hard to do in a house with five other people. And the day was far from over. In fact it has barely begun, the show opened in less than a week and Anne just couldn’t focus, she’s already lost track of the amount of times she’s messed up, she was getting more frustrated each time and she could tell some of the queens where getting annoyed with having to keep restarting. After making another mistake they had a break and grace pulled her aside.

“Are you okay? You look a little pale”

“Yeah, I’m fine, it’s just nerves”

“are you sure?”

“Yeah, I swear I’m okay”

“Okay, do you mind if I step in for a bit, you could just chill”

“Sure, I’m going to step outside for a bit of air”

The other queens watched as Anne spoke with Grace then left the room without saying anything to any of them, as Grace walked towards them Katherine spoke up.

“What’s going on? where’s Anne going?”

“I’m stepping in for a bit so she’s gone to get some fresh air, I don’t think she’s feeling too great”

Grace then went on to get some water leaving Katherine looking at the door Anne left through long enough for Jane to notice the worried look on her face.

“She’s fine love, it’s pretty warm in here today so she probably just needs to cool down a bit”

“But what if something’s wrong, she’s my family and she usually tells me where she’s going even if it’s just the next room over”

“I’ll tell you what, we have another break after we’ve run through the show with Grace, if she’s not back inside by then I’ll go get her”

“I guess that’s okay”

An hour passed, they’d nearly finished the run through but Anne had yet to return and Jane could see Katherine was getting more worried by the minute, the second they finished Katherine walked straight over to Jane stopping right in front of her, Jane noticed the slight sway as katherine stood there, it was one of many nervous habits that she’d noticed amongst the queens.

“I’ll go get her, you stay here okay”

“Please”

Grabbing her jacket beforehand it didn’t take long for Jane to spot Anne once she stepped outside the studio, by the looks of it she didn’t even go outside instead she was sitting on the ground not far from the studio with her head on her knees, one hand playing with her ear the other wrapped around her knees fiddling with something she was holding. Sitting down next to her Jane placed a hand on Anne’s knee to which Anne responded by flinching making her drop what she’d been holding and backing away until she hit a corner where she pressed herself against the wall fear evident in her eyes, to Jane it looked like her mind was somewhere else, like she wasn’t aware of anything going on around her.

“Anne?....come on lo…”

Jane stopped when she stood on something, looking down she saw the thing Anne had been holding, upon closer inspection she realised it was a choker, looking back at Anne she noticed the scar that wrapped itself around her neck, trying not to react she looked back at the choker in her hand before she had an idea. Slowly she made her way over to Anne in the least threatening way possible, she wasn’t sure what Anne was seeing but she didn’t want to make it worse by startling her again. As gently as possible she placed the choker in Anne’s hand and sat still and waited for a reaction.

While watching Anne start fiddling with the choker again Jane realised just how much her and the other queens overlooked, with Katherine it was obvious she needs someone there to help her deal with her past traumas but here right in front of her was a queen whose life came to an end in such an awful manner, of course she was dealing with her own trauma but no one thought to see how she was doing and the result of that ignorance was breaking Jane’s heart knowing that Anne may have been struggling with no one to help her. She saw Anne slump slightly looking a bit more relaxed but still quite tense and still playing with the choker.

“Anne?”

This time Anne looked at her, only this was definitely not the Anne Jane was used to, right now it was like an empty shell was looking at her instead of the overly confident, loud, deeply intelligent girl she’d grown to see as her true family.

“Come on love, we can’t stay out here”

Anne just looked down again bringing her free hand up to her ear again

“Anne, what’s wrong?”

She heard Anne mutter something but couldn’t make out what she actually said.

“I’m sorry dear I didn’t hear that”

“I can’t do anything right”

“We know that’s not true”

Anne looked up again tears running down her cheeks.

“I can’t, everything I do just ends up wrong, I keep messing up the routine, I keep annoying the others when I make mistakes, I can’t even hide this scar properly, I tried to loosen my choker and instead I broke it, I wouldn’t need to hide it if I’d just had a son in the first place, four times I could have made him happy but instead I have a daughter and lose the others and he has me killed”

Jane didn’t know what to say, Anne still wasn’t 100% with her, all she can do is sit there and try to reassure her, 20 minutes pass and she feels her phone buzz in her pocket, seeing she had a text from Katherine she unlocked the phone

_ How is she? Are you coming back soon? _

How is she? Not good, but she couldn’t tell Katherine that, but she couldn’t say she was fine either, this was anything but fine.

_ She’s not feeling too well, I’m going to take her home _

Returning the phone to her pocket she looked back at Anne who was starting to look more present, getting up she offered her hand to Anne making sure to not actually touch her in case she’d shrink further back into her mind.

“Come on love, let’s go home”

Anne looked at Jane’s hand for what felt like an eternity before letting go of her ear and taking hold of Jane’s hand to hoist herself up. Once up she leant into Jane as they walked to the car.

“Jane?”

“Yes love?”

“Why are you here?”

“Because I care, you’re family Anne and you may not see it right now but we all care about you”

“But I keep making mistakes”

“We all make mistakes, right now our biggest one is not noticing how you are feeling”

“I didn’t want you to notice, I can handle it”

“Anne, you need to start talking to us, any one of us is willing to listen”

“Why couldn’t he just be happy with me?”

“I don’t know love, I wish I did”

The rest of the journey was spent in silence, the only thing Jane could think out now was how she wasn’t going to let Anne suffer alone anymore.


End file.
